MS Post - Body Screams for Mercy

I knew going into to 2014 that the end of April and beginning of May were going to be busy and stressful.  Normally I know it would likely impact my thyroid and adrenals and that I would coast into May on fumes.  Being diagnosed with MS seems different, as even though I will likely struggle with my thyroid and adrenals I had finally somewhat figured out what I need to do to keep from tanking.  With MS I am starting at the first chapter of a book that hasn't been written yet.  I don't know what the beast will throw at me.  So far it has been numb hands and feet, which got worse the last 10 days.  Mild headaches from my meds actually dissipated the last two weeks with all the stress but are back hammering me in the head this morning.  The adventures of bladder control and three times a week injections (with an ice chaser) plus the joy of workout related flare ups (the creeping tingles) these things have all shown themselves and I am adjusting.  Photo below is one of the injectors I use to take my meds.

The last two weeks of April were busy at work kicking off a new project with a new contractor team.  As the program chair I also had a lot of program changes coming in for the 2014 GIS for Transportation Symposium.  So heading to Vermont the first week of May for this international conference with over 350 people, and four tracks of talks over three days I was already stressing.  The conference was wrought with constant program changes unlike I had experienced before and this is my fifth year working on the program.  Not sure what the deal was as we are pretty regimented in our protocols but just a lot of people being unprofessional with last minute decisions.  I found myself sitting in sessions getting texts and emails with more and more changes and that drove me to my room many afternoons to lay down and have quiet conversations or naps.  I came away from the conference having gotten enough sleep all but one night, minimal drinking and a pretty health intake of quality food.  I even got three short and sweet workouts in while I was there.

Of course then I get back to Iowa and the next day went to Girl Scout camp with nine of my troop of fourth graders.  We had preplanned all the food and another mom made that happen for us so I basically just had to show up at the drop off spot and go have fun.  We had a great time of hiking, archery, fire building, camp stories and even got some decent sleep.

I got home from camp and the family thrust Mother's Day upon me.  To top it off Joe and I had a huge fight which is pretty rare.  Monday night we had JJs preschool program and Tuesday night I had my triathlon team kick off gathering and by Wed I hit a wall.  I normally stand at work part of the day as my computer is on a stand that goes up and down.  By noon I was forced to sit.  Thursday morning I could barely drag myself out of bed, but I did it anyway because that is how I am.  I spent the whole day sitting, very still, wishing I was home laying down despite being quite productive.  That night I took Abby to soccer and spent quiet time journaling.  By Friday morning I was feeling only a little bit better and managed to get through the morning before finally going home and taking a nap.  I knew I had to go serve dinner at the soup kitchen Friday night and volunteer at a triathlon on Sunday plus time at the soccer pitch Saturday morning.  The nap Friday helped me.  I started Saturday with my forth day in a row with no exercise which was making me stir crazy!  I had a lot of fun on Sunday at the triathlon serving water with my kids and came home for a rest before spending a little time in the yard.

By now you are probably thinking "what are you doing Shawn!!"  Yeah me too.  When fatigue hits me (not something that is new to me unfortunately) I feel like I have led in my arms and legs.  Even the slightest effort, like holding open a book, or taking a step require the most focused effort.  All I want to do is lay quietly and watch a program on TV or sleep.  All the while the things I know need to be done are eating away at me.  I am terrible at being idle but I clearly need to work on reprogramming myself.  My friends with MS all said that when fatigue hits I need to listen.  I was completely overwhelmed by the intensity and duration of this round.  Things are slowing down for me now, my list is still long, and I get my temporary summer friend (a beautiful new specialized racing bike) tomorrow so I hope to get back to training very soon.  I did go to my core class today and stayed for the five minutes of corpse pose at the end.  It went way too fast, so with that, I will try to work in more down time, ask for help more, and keep trying to figure out how to manage my stressors.  As always thanks for reading.