MS Update - Sometimes its ok to not be ok

Well, it has been a little over a month since I posted my last update that isn’t a race report.  Sorry about that as time has been whizzing by and I guess I didn’t have much to say or maybe mental space to formulate my thoughts.  There are a lot of links in this post which mostly go to race report blog posts over the last month and interesting MS related posts by others.

What I’ve been up to since Mid-June.  I again helped out with the kids triclinic series with my triclub and will do it one more time this weekend.  My second time working with the kids I was able to bring Abigail along and she had a blast so we have signed her up for her first kids triathlon on the same course the training sessions have been on for July 26th.  She is pretty excited.

We’ve been doing T-ball with Joshua who has his final “game” on tonight.  I had a great five days with my family over the fourth of July with two good runs, a great bike ride, boating and swimming, great

Joshua at T-Ball Practice

food. family book reading adventures, games, fireworks, and of course the parade “of politicians” in Clear Lake, Iowa.

We did two family fun runs, the Hope Run which raises money for Hospice House.  The second one was the Iowa Games Midnight Madness run this past weekend and both are in Ames.  As a family we dropped our time three minutes between the two and had a lot of fun together.

Abby at Girl Scout Camp

Joe and I rode the MS Bike Ride in Ames.  I received a awesome group of donations for the MS Bike Ride.  The grand total was $851 and exceeded all expectations!  Thank you to everyone who supported me through donations to the MS Society and continue to support me on this journey!

The pole that got me last year

People who donated:

Colleagues: Bob Y, Lance W, Joe D, Craig B, Mitch C., Sharon H., Sarah K

Teammates: Christian B, Sarah C., Jesse F, Laurie S

Others affected by MS: Charlie N, Aaron R

Friends and Neighbors: Barb M, Henrietta H. Amy D, Siggi

Last but not least my Family: Gloria M., Mom and Dad, Nancy W

I also did two triathlons Copper Creek triathlon which was a day full of firsts.  This past weekend I did the Iowa Games Triathlon which was a better experience for me.  It feels great to be racing again however leading up to Copper Creek and the week or two after that race I was really struggling.  I felt like I am dragging a weight along behind me and all my workouts with runs especially, as well as trying to manage my thoughts.  It feels like my body and my mind are going at a half clip, bogged down and slow motion.  I really noticed my scattered mind in the pool which is a place I can normally count laps without thinking and work through other stuff at the same time.  I am not reacting physically as quickly as I normally do, I am not able to think as quickly and anticipate things out into the future in my thought process.  Part of it has been the heat that smoldered through the month of June and I have always been sensitive to the heat.  I suspect part of it is related to the disease of MS and part of it is related to the meds I am taking to combat MS.

Despite having better workouts the last couple of weeks I still got hung up with some sort of sinus crud that had drainage running down my throat off and on for couple of weeks.  Around the 4th of July it all landed in my chest like a cold but stopped bothering me after that.  I also got my allergy meds filled so I have on hand if things stir up again.  Once things hit my chest a migraine moved into my head for three days thanks to a series of weather fronts, ongoing dehydration on my part and who knows what else.  I didn’t have a chance to slow down as I was to lead three days of meetings over four days in Des Moines for the Iowa Geographic Information Council and then for the GIS-T Planning Committee two organizations with which I am active.  The only saving grace in this scenario was Abigail was at Girl Scout horse camp all week and Joshua was at my folks place in Clear Lake so the house was quieter.

I may have mentioned we have a new kitten who has been with us since memorial day.  Lilah is a busy, curious, and super cute.  Her boundless energy is constantly annoying our older cat Aslan (14) so now whenever she comes near him he wails even if it is 2 or 5am which has really put a dent in my ability to get a decent night of sleep lately.  Plus we had a slew of thunderstorms through at night which gets the dogs all stirred up and a night on the couch with a dog panting anxiously in my face is really not all it is cracked up to be.  After nearly a week of sleep interruptus I am running on fumes physically and mentally.  I love the furballs but I could do with some storm free weather and a little more tolerance from the lot of them.

I mentioned in my June post that the meds have been dragging my blood count down.    My white blood counts had both my doctors in a bit of a fit.  I may have mentioned they were half the count they were before I started taking the meds.  I was retested two weeks ago and they have come about halfway back up but are still well below normal.  I see my neurologist in a couple of weeks to talk through things.  I am struggling with meds that do potentially do as much harm as good.  I am tired of being tired and tired of being mentally muddled all the time.  I am tired of bickering kids and howling furballs.  Wednesday I woke up with an achy body and a headache and yet I keep marching.  

So while this post talks about things that lift me or drag me down… my husband said I don’t have anything to prove to anyone.  I don’t have to be happy and strong all the time because I am human after all.  I have to keep proving to myself I can do this, I have to keep collecting data about how my diet affects my energy and the exercise that keeps me going.  I have to keep getting out of bed each day because I would miss out on all the good things I have going on even if I grumble sometimes.  I have to be proactive so today I started working with a personal trainer to help me continue to get stronger and rebuild my confidence. I will keep remembering to breath and hopefully get back to my meditation and tai chi.  I am working to better communicate when I need help and when I am good. Looks like I got this for now... as always thanks for listening.

Here are some great blogs and other information by/about folks with MS.

http://www.milesandtrials.com/ironman-boulder-70-3-race-recap/

http://www.healedthefilm.com/

http://mattcavallo.com/blog/

Race Report - Iowa Games Triathlon July 13th

Iowa Games Triathlon was a late addition to my race list for 2014 and I knew I was doing Midnight Madness the night before but decided to go for it.  I generally don’t prefer to do sprint triathlons because I like the training challenges related to doing Olympic distance races.  The difference between the two look something like this with a little variation depending on races (Sprint/Olympic): Swim (500 yds/1580 yds), Bike (15 miles/25 miles), Run (3.1 miles/6.2 miles)

Pre-race fog taken by teammate Christian at chip pickup

This year my perspective has been a little different since I was not able to race much the last two seasons due to injury.  After racing Copper Creek, even though I did not have a goal and had all my “firsts” noted in my last blog, I was not feeling very good about where things were at for me this season.  In the midst of some emotions last week my husband reminded me that I do not have to prove anything to anyone but I felt like I needed to prove something to myself.  Copper Creek was my “yeah I remember how to do this” but I still needed to find my way to stronger workouts and a better head space.

Shooting the breeze with Christian before the race

Fortunately the weather had been a little cooler leading up to the race and I had some quality rides and runs which helped with the head space issue.  It was super foggy when I got up on race day which gave me some flashbacks to racing the Chisago Lakes half ironman in 2011.  I hoped to myself things would clear up so we could see the buoys.  I needed not worry as the sun was shining by the time I made the 40 minute drive south to Easter Lake.

My first indicator this was going to be a great day, my race number is my birthday 525. After picking up my swag, cap and number I stopped down for my race chip and said hello to teammate Christian who was volunteering at the race.  I got my gear and set up my space next to my other teammate Laura and then the Kyle’s Bike crew who was racing, Laura, Andy, Scott and myself had a quick photo shoot thanks to Laura’s husband Devin.

Coming out of the lake to T1

The swim

I was feeling excited while we waited on the beach for the start and chatted some more with my teammates and other racers.  I was picked earlier in the week to be a beta tester for the Bia women’s GPS triathlon watch and was glad not to have to fiddle with buttons like I did at Copper Creek.  I was again in the 5th swim wave and had decided to not hold back.  I was second out of the water in my heat with a time of 6:38.

The Bike

Moving through transition

My transition was much better this time with my shoes open and ready so I was in and out in just over a minute.  Then off to the bike course on the Specialized Alias that Kyle’s Bikes provided for me to race on.  This bike is set up very similar to the one I normally ride but is most comfortable in aero position.  It does a good job of absorbing the bumps in the road which came in handy leaving the park.  Similar to Copper Creek my quads were barking at me the first couple of miles but the course is a pretty technical so I had to focus.  It is a twisty hilly three loop ride with the first couple of miles winding to a big downhill near the Primate Sanctuary, a short curving flat leading to a significant long uphill before winding back around to the beginning.  Teammate Christian parked himself near the top of the long uphill and was giving encouragement to everyone as they rolled up.  I found myself pushing harder to get to the top and didn't have any mechanicals this time.  I got off the bike at 53 minutes which leaves a lot of room for improvement and was in and out of transition in under a minute as I did put my speed laces on my sneakers after Copper Creek.

Climbing the big hill with a smile

The Run

First loop of run course

Coming out of T2 this time I felt strangely free of my normal spaghetti leg feeling and was moving at a good clip for me.  The run course is not one of my favorites as it is a two lap loop that has two offshoots through uneven grass on the way out and a long sunny flat on the way back.  By the time I was on my second loop the temperatures were pushing 80 and I was wishing I had asked one of my teammates to hand me the baggy of ice I had brought with me at the turn around.  Needless to say I felt like I was suffering by the end of the second mile.  At the turn around to head back to the finish I checked my watch for my pace and time and realized I was going to be close to my goal for the day but that I would need to finish strong so I did the best I could to pick up the pace rather than continuing to wilt in the heat.  My final run time was 29.10 with a total time of 1:31 which was just over my goal for the day.

At the finish I took one icy water bottle and poured it all over myself to cool down and then drank a second one and was good to go.  I was surprised to have no notable MS flare up aside from the heat slowing me down on the run but will need some crew support to get through my next two Olympic Triathlon races in August.

My Bia buddy... as you can see she is faster.  :)

In wrap up, I felt this was a solid race for me but still leaves me with room to improve.  I will be working with a personal trainer over the next six weeks to continue to strengthen my bike and run.  The triathlon mode on the Bia is awesome and I will be doing a blog post it soon talking about the benefits. I even made a bia buddy at the race.  I feel more prepared and found that I enjoyed my day so was glad I added this race to my list.  

A huge shout out of thanks to teammates Laura, Andy, Scott who all had great a great race.  Also to Laura’s husband Devin who took most of the race photos, teammate Christian who seemed to be everywhere cheering us on also taking photos, and the great crew of Triracers volunteering and on the course.  Also a huge thank you goes out to Kyle's Bikes and the discount tri supply team for sponsoring me this year. It was an awesome day!

Most of the Kyle's Bikes team: Scott, Andy, Christian, Shawn and Laura

Race Report - Midnight Madness July 12th

We have been doing family runs since Abigail, now ten, was a toddler and it was great to come together after a week of our family being dispersed across the state.  This is the fourth year Joe and I have run Midnight Madness and the third year we have done this as a family.  The race has a kids sprint at 7pm, 5k at 7:30 and 10k at 8:30pm followed by popsicles and a spaghetti feed with live music.  While it is part of the Iowa Games suite of events, it is more of an Ames community family running party.  This year was special because a large group of participants was out in rainbow colored T-shirts in memorial of Timothy Jenks, the 13 year old son of one of my Triracers teammates who died tragically in a triathlon training bike accident in late June.  They are setting up a memorial scholarship fund so stay tuned for details on how to support this effort.

We blew a tire on the front of the bike buggy after Hope Run and of course forgot about it until the last minute.  We fully intended to have Joe and Joshua who is 5, run walk together until we bumped into one of my Girl Scout families whose daughter spent last week at Girl Scout camp with Abby.  They offered to let the little guy watch the races with them, although he did get to do the kids race with Captain Midnight.  He has been wearing his little cape ever since.

In a rarity for Midnight Madness the temps were cooler and the humidity was lower than normal for this race which made for a comfortable run.  We wove our way to the middle of the starting pack and Abby got us off at a good clip.  I find that as she sees people she knows she picks up the pace to run them down and as a result we got through course with a bit more speed than the Hope Run.  

As we crossed the bridge over Grand Ave and could see the finish line I knew the only way I would finish with them was if I pushed out ahead of them with a strong finish so I ran the last three blocks alone until I heard Joe and Abby pounding after me and giggling about ten feet from the finish.  Our official three way photo finish time was 31:38 which bested our Hope Run time by three minutes.  I am super proud of Abigail for her performance on this one, and later while we watched the ladies leaders coming into the 10k turn around she looked at me and asked if she could go that fast one day.  I told her maybe but only with a lot of hard work and determination.  Next up for Abigail is her first kids triathlon hosted by the Triathlon Racers of Iowa and the city of Ankeny July 26th.  Next up for me is the Iowa Games Triathlon tomorrow.